Editorial: On English despair

Of the cricketing variety. Mike Selvey in The Guardian this morning does it best:

Watching England was a painful experience yesterday. Extracting your own pancreas with a knife and fork could not be more so. The promise of an opening stand of 68 ended unfortunately when Andrew Strauss trod on his stumps - as if England have not discovered enough ways to get out in recent times - and was followed by a decline and fall of the middle and lower orders of such magnitude it might have been recorded by Gibbon.

Which could be the best opening para to a sports report. Ever.